El Salvador Part 1: There is Need

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience... And above all these put on love which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful - Colossians 3:12-15

Ten days ago, i returned to the United States, after spending 10 days in El Salvador and Guatemala. I'm frustrated that i've allowed a busy lifestyle to keep me from seriously reflecting about all the Lord revealed on this trip. Or perhaps in this reflecting of the trip, He's seriously continued to teach me just how much need there is - for Him, in any and all that we do.




Upon first arriving in Guatemala and El Salvador, my 'American', white, middle class perspective instantly detected how much need exists in the two countries. Homes are made of cement, concrete, tin, whatever is available; yards fenced in with jagged sticks and scraps. The bright paint on the majority of homes has become dull - worn, chipped, corroded, unkept. Some of the dirt roads are more like rocky, muddy and uneven terrain, simply used as a road because they've been worn down and used so much. There are stray dogs everywhere, mangy and emaciated - a look of hunger and closeness to death gleaming in their eyes. The plumbing systems are unable to break down toilet paper, bridges aren't exactly the safest, drinking the water is NOT recommended, Burger Kings and McDonalds are patrolled by armed security guards. Clearly, there is need. There is need.



As i stared out the window of the van, heading to El Salvador, God truly revealed something to me. I watched the torrential downpour turn roads into sloppy messes. Safe and dry in the van, we passed families forced to evacuate their houses, as they started to flood. I kept thinking - there is NEED. THERE IS NEED. So much need here. It disgusted me. I become outraged as i began to pray and ask God how it could be so. Why am i so blessed to live in the safety and security of the United States, comfortably in a middle class family?! How unfair. I have too many clothes to count, i am educated, i have a car. I have everything i need and then some. And yet, here in the United States, there is still need. Our society is selfish and highly individualized. Money = success. We do not allow ourselves to be seen as weak or to admit our faults and failures, strength is coveted. We wear masks to conceal our biggest pains, fears, hurts and true state of being. We buy more than we can afford. We are highly consumed and caught up in commercialism. This is our need.



And while the need in El Salvador and Guatemala is more apparent in different ways, especially with the mentality and mindset of a United States citizen, God revealed to me that there is need everywhere. This is the condition of this fallen world. But in our need - whether it's poverty that grips us, addictions, obsessions, hurts, scars, wounds, pain, etc. - we realize our need for something MORE. Something NOT of this world. Someone bigger than ourselves, bigger than the pains and poverty. We need Jesus. Whether we live in Guatemala, El Salvador, Africa, the US, or any other nation, we need Jesus. Once we admit that we are absolutely nothing, that we are completely depraved without Him, can He truly meet our needs. In reaching out to our brothers and sisters in poverty and different parts of the world, may the Lord soften our hearts as well, and identify our own need for and necessary reliance on Him. May we reach out to those in poverty - not because we are better or greater, but because we have been blessed immensely and are called to share the wealth and resources.

There is need. There always will be, until Jesus comes back. May the Lord reveal our own need for Him. May we respond to His calling and humble ourselves before Him. May the needs of this world not hinder us, cripple us or bring us to an apathetic state, but open our eyes and RESPOND. Bring revival, God. Bring a further reliance on YOU.



Give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with the food that is needful for me, lest i be full and deny you and say, "Who is the Lord?" Proverbs 30:8 My prayer is that the Lord changes my heart, to truly be more than satisfied with not being rich and not being poor. I want to be at a place where i rely on Him always, where i recognize my need for Him in any state of life.


"I see the cloud i stand in,
i want to see your glory as Moses did.
Flashes of light, rolls of thunder,
i'm not afraid. i'm not afraid.

Show me Your glory, show me Your glory.

I'm awed by Your beauty,
lost in Your eyes,
I want to walk in Your glory like Jesus did.
Your glory surrounds me,
i'm overwhelmed"
-Jesus Culture

Addictions and El Salvador

The team has returned from Guatemala and El Salvador. Wow, what a trip. The Lord is astounding and powerful and faithful. His works and ways are perfect. As i was on the trip and dwelling on all that the Lord was revealing, i felt called to write about experiences that fall into three parts and plan on blogging them during the next week:

Part 1: There is Need
Part 2: Beauty in Simplicity
Part 3: There is God

I was so blessed to meet so many amazing people on this trip, to bond with the team and see the Lord's hand. Being the photography lover i am, i took over 1,000 photos and can't wait to include them in the next few blogs! Keep checking in - they'll be up soon :)

For now, I'll keep this short and sweet, as God is still revealing so much, post-mission trip. Some call it culture shock. Already, I am so shocked at how consumerism, commercialism and a need to have so much STUFF grips America. I'm addicted to shopping. Yes, I only bargain shop, but i get suckered in to buying so much STUFF. Clothes, mostly. It seems as though our addictions are most apparent and most tempting when we're under stress or pressure, or our emotions are out of whack. Isn't that crazy? That's when the Lord wants our hearts and attention MOST - when we are vulnerable and feel the weight of the world and need His sweet love and mercy. So why, why do we turn to our addictions to temporarily satisfy us? I feel called to give up clothes shopping for a year. 365 days. That seems impossible - especially for me!! But i fully believe i can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. It will be a battle, that's for sure - no shirts, no pants, no jeans, no accessories, no SHOES, no NOTHING. Nothing for 365 days. Until July 24,2011. Christ Jesus, give me strength. Give me Your heart, an ability to see the need in this world. A desire and thirst for You that cannot be quenched by consumerism or any other addiction.

Busyness, Beauty Pageants and El Salvador

"For i know the plans i have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope..." Jeremiah 29:11

Last summer, my 'plans' did not include being a part of the Miss Lakeville Scholarship Pageant. Last summer, i never would've seen myself heading to El Salvador. Last summer, I had NO idea of the Lord's plans for me - to grow me and mature me. And though yes, it was and has been an excruciatingly painful journey, there have been sweet moments and beacons of hope, pointing to the Lord's promise. I would not, i could not, exchange the pain and loss and pruning of my heart for the relationship i now have with the Lord. Though sometimes i struggle in choosing the Lord's will over my own, He is constant, He is worth it, His will is always good and righteous.

So, in a super brief summary, my life has been CRAZY! I love the go go go, but i also have felt a lack of God-time impact my heart and i am thirsting for more of Him. Let's see...busyness. I've been keeping busy with TONS of photography editing, some wedding shoots, engagement shoots, BABY shoots - thank you God, for the opportunities :). I have also been working to complete my last online class before i technically 'graduate'. I've been trying to see as many amazing people and spend time with them. Spending time with family, preparing for El Salvador, working at Applebees and Data Entry and most recently, being crazy busy with Miss Lakeville stuff. Which brings me to my second point - Beauty Pageants. I have been blessed to spend time with 10 amazing women as we have practiced and prepared for the Miss Lakeville scholarship program. The pageant was on Wednesday night! It all went so fast. The highlight for me was praying with all the contestants before the show went on, giving God all the glory. It's so easy to get caught up in ourselves, i feel, especially in a pageant. And the Lord deserves all the glory and honor. As the pageant went on, thank you God - i was not nervous! I can truly say, trusting in Him with the outcome helped relieve that nervousness. And wow, i was honored to receive Miss Congeniality and First Princess, runner up to the beautiful Miss Lakeville - Jenna Diercks. I love all the women that competed, they have such beautiful hearts and a variety of passions. And i look forward to spending the next year with Tiffany Payne and Jenna as we are ambassadors of Lakeville - what!? Crazy title, huh?! Haha. Yesterday was crazy busy with the parade and all the Pan O Prog events. Today is the Appreciation Picnic and then it's time to pack for El Salvador.



Mmm, El Salvador. I have the amazing opportunity to help lead, along with Brie Peters, Nathan Lyke and Jackie Koch a group of 17 wonderful high schoolers on a 10 day mission trip! We leave TOMORROW at 3:30 in the MORNING! Can you believe it?! It has come so fast!!! We'll be traveling through parts of Guatemala and El Salvador and visiting orphanages, performing skits we've prepared, and just reaching out to people and sharing the love of the Lord and the Good news. I can not wait. I would be more than thankful if you would pray for the team - for the Good News to be heard and accepted, for the hearts and lives of those in El Salvador and Guatemala, for healings, for miracles, for safety and health, for unity. Thank you, SO MUCH. This missionary's heart is SO excited to see God move.

So, until July 21, I will be in El Salvador. And in this busy, joyful season, I have learned the importance of making time to spend with the Lord. It is necessary - for peace and for our heart to remain steadfast in Him. Do you feel that thirst? That unsatiable desire and need to spend time in Him? BEHOLDING Him? It is truly what we all need more of. What's been going on in your life? What has the Lord been revealing? I would LOVE to hear about it!






*Ignore the cheesy music video, this song is AMAZING.

Naked Faces: Makeup Fast Reflection

This is a reflection, in response to a previous blog post and challenge: One Week: No Makeup.

I went five days without makeup. Truth be told, i felt ashamed of a naked face at times - less put together, less...beautiful. At the same time, being free from the bondages of makeup was liberating! There was no need to check my face to ensure my makeup hadn't run, no need to touch up, no chance to hide behind a mask that covers my flaws.

As i have prayed about this follow up post, i can't shake the thought that our obsession with makeup and appearance is directly related to the Fall. In the beginning, Eve was not ashamed of her nakedness - which had to include a natural, naked face - as she dwelled in the presence of God and walked alongside Him. So when [Eve] saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took its fruit and ate...then the eyes of [Adam and Eve] were open and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths - Genesis 3:6-7 Eating from the Tree of Knowledge went directly against God and, from the received knowledge, made us ashamed of our nakedness. I think it is safe to say that here, an obsession with beauty and a craving to be perceived as such, entered the lives of all women. With shame came a need to cover ourselves - and makeup does just that.

So, my next step? I truly admire women that have chosen to live their day-to-day life makeup free. For now, i feel that God prompted this fast as a rude awakening and to instill an awareness of just how pressing the need to be beautiful is for the majority of women. For now, i will continue to wear makeup on most days. While there isn't a perceived lifestyle change, there is definitely a change in mindset and heart. I will not be ashamed to walk out of the house without makeup. I will not allow makeup to define me, to rule over my heart and be directly associated with beauty. Every time i put on makeup, it will be necessary to examine my heart and question my intentions. There may be future times when the Lord calls me to give up makeup again. And, first and foremost, the true beauty that every woman holds comes from her spirit. As 1 Peter 3:4 reminds us, this beauty is not fleeting, it is not fading, nor perishable. This beauty is eternal, as our spirit is of the Lord - the one and only constant, the Creator of all things beautiful and good.

You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride; you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes...how beautiful is your love, my sister my bride! How much better is your love than wine... - Song of Solomon 4:9-10 Our Bridegroom is enthralled by us, He is ravished by our beauty - what could be better than our CREATOR finding us simply stunning, just as we are? Do you believe it? I mean, do you truly trust that who we are in the Lord is where our true beauty comes from? We, sinning and imperfect, are beautifully redeemed, made beautiful in Him - beauty from ashes, life from His death. Not MAC, not Clinique, not Maybelline, nor any other makeup, not the clothes we wear, the jewelry, the tattoos, the...stuff we adorn ourselves in define us or make us any more beautiful. It is the Lord, and His love for us. Let our souls find rest in this, let our thirst for beauty be satiated in how the Creator looks at us. May we invest more time and concern in our relationship with the Lord than our outward appearance - that is my prayer in all of this.

I challenge each one of us to examine our hearts - do you truly know and TRUST HE has made us beautiful? A relationship with the Lord is the essence of beauty.

Take a look at these lovely women, embracing the natural, genuine beauty each of them possess. <3 Behold, you are beautiful, my love; behold you are beautiful; your eyes are doves. - Song of Solomon 1:15

One Week: No Makeup

I feel the pressures of social norms and the grip they have on my life. Since when are we unable to leave the house without putting makeup on - even if it's just a quick touch up with mascara and powder? Why do we feel the need to make ourselves up and put so much time into our appearance? Since when does make up and putting time into our appearance so directly effect our self esteem - why must it define us and hold this much control over our lives? Disgusting. I am not bashing people who wear make up - i enjoy getting dolled up just as much as any other girl. I also think make up can accentuate the natural beauty each of us posses. What i am bashing is the make up industry partnering with society's power to make us feel like we NEED make up. To associate so much beauty with stupid products. I'm upset that we, that i, as a woman have allowed myself to buy into the lie that i need makeup. So, i feel the Lord prompting me to fast - from any and all makeup whatsoever. Instead of spending time painting my face, I hope to invest this time and energy in the eternal hope and relationship i have with the Lord. Instead of checking my face and making sure my make up doesn't need touching up everytime i look in the mirror, i want to see beyond and rest assured knowing true beauty is not external.

Make up

Make up FREE! Day 1


Do not let your adorning be external - the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear - but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious - 1 Peter 3:4

May the condition of our hearts and the hearts of those God puts in our path be our priority - all the glory to God and not to us. May we truly understand the beauty of seeking the Lord and the IMPERISHABLE, EVERLASTING beauty each of us possess in the relationship we have with the Beloved. All of the lies we've come to believe as women - God, crush them. May we find our beauty in you. So, one week. Until next Tuesday; I will not wear makeup of any kind - chapstick is the only exception.

We Cry Out

The righteous cry out and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. -Psalm 34:17

I worked at Applebees until late tonight. The whole drive home was a blur, since i was exhausted from a busy night at work. After flipping through radio stations, good old 91.5 came to my rescue with this song: Jesus Culture's We Cry Out. Simple lyrics, simple message, yet so so POWERFUL.

Oh Lord, we cry out, we've been lost
We need your mercies, O God.
We repent for our ways, and we turn to You again.

O Lord,we cry out, we've been lost
Change our hearts to YOURS, O God.
We repent for our sin, and we turn to You again.

O God, we cry out for Your mercy
O God, we cry out for Your grace
O God, we cry out, set us free
O God, we cry out, once again.

In those seasons and those days when we are weary and exhausted, the Lord brings restoration and REST. He delivers, sends a REVIVAL for our hearts and our souls. May we cry out to Him amongst any and all trials, joys and jubilee. Thank you Lord for your unfailing Love, for Your mercy and Your abounding grace that covers the entirety of our sins and unworthiness. Bring revival, God. Shake hearts of stone, make them beat in and for Your name once again. Bring passion. We cry out to you, Lord. It is all for You. We need You, oh how we need You.

Glory in his holy name;
let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice!
Seek the Lord and his strength;
seek his presence continually!
Remember the wondrous works that he has done,
his miracles, and the judgments he uttered,
O offspring of Abraham, his servant,
children of Jacob, his chosen ones!
~Psalms 105:3-6



The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
"The Lord is my portion," says my soul,
"therefore i will hope in him."
The Lord is good to those who wait for him,
to the soul who seeks him.
It is good that one should wait quietly
for the salvation of the Lord.
-Lamentations 3:22-27

ONE voice.

'Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For i was hungry and you gave me food, i was thirsty and you gave me drink, i was a stranger and you welcomed me, i was naked and you clothed me, i was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.' Then the righteous will answer him, saying, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you...?" And the King will answer them, "Truly, i say to you, as you did it to one of the least of my brothers, you did it to me." -Matthew 25:34-40

Who am i to have the security of living in safe suburbia? Who am i that i have the opportunity to receive a good education? Who am i that i have more than enough food to eat whenever, wherever, at my disposal? Not to mention clean water, medical services, shopping centers, parks, sidewalks, paved roads, cars, beaches, clean air, eye glasses, immunizations, and money.

And who would i be if i remained an ignorant, white woman who never looked beyond the safety and security of the community i was blessed beyond BELIEF to grow up in? Who would i be if i didn't share the resources, the blessings, the opportunities, the gifts I've received surely by God's grace alone? Who would i be if i didn't reach out, if i remained ill-informed and apathetic? Who would i be if i didn't use my one voice for the good and well being of others?

As i drove home from the Waite House today, all of these questions ran through my mind. I have been given an opportunity to be educated, to open my eyes and to serve others in my community - to hear about, witness and spread the news of others without the security i have. I tend to shy away from politics - i guess, in a sense, ignorance is bliss. But if i am ignorant, if i do not fight for what i believe is right, if my voice remains silent, ignorance is crippling. Is my faith enough? Surely, the answer is yes. My faith in a God who sent His beloved son to walk on this earth and touch the untouchable, reach out to those in need, feed the hungry, tend to the sick, RAISE PEOPLE FROM THE DEAD, welcome any and all - that is my God. That is Jesus Christ, my Lord, and my reason to fight. I went to a prayer vigil at the Ramsey County Prison this afternoon, and boy, was it powerful. To see others join together in this fight to partake in the most powerful, yet simple thing was astounding - the power of prayer! It was amazing to see strangers give my U of M classmates and i money to put towards our Food Shelf Drive for the Waite House - simply humbling.

Yes, immigration is a tough issue. I'm not saying i have all the answers or know of a solution to this tough topic. But what i am sure of, is the need to look beyond the title of "alien", "illegal immigrant", "latino" or "black" or "white" and see a human LIFE. There is a need to look past patriotism and love of country and begin to love on and serve others in NEED. There is a reason why so many risk their lives crossing dry deserts and deadly bodies of water in attempts to seek refuge in this country. Truly, this is not a threat but a cry of DESPERATION. And who are we to quickly point fingers at 'outsiders' as the root of our economic problems or current state? That is a truly ridiculous lie. As followers of Christ, are we not called to welcome strangers? Since when does patriotism come before our everlasting faith in our everlasting King? There must be a better solution, than to violently turn foreigners away; than to have the right to demand proof of citizenship from anyone that appears "foreign", for this is truly racial profiling. There must be a better way to approach those held in detention centers by refusing them food/drink, a clean place to stay and taking all their belongings. There MUST be a better way. And it may involve reaching beyond the boarder to the root of the problem.

In the choice between patriotism and humanity, can the well being of human lives be compromised for love of country? Certainly not. "A man may have to die for our country: but no man must, in any exclusive sense, live for his country. He who surrenders himself without reservation to the temporal claims of a nation, or of a party, or a class is rendering to Caesar that which, of all things, most empathetically belongs to God: himself" -C.S. Lewis

How could i stay silent, apathetic and in the dark all of these years? I am but one voice. But backed with purpose, a faith in the Lord's power and the need of fellow human beings, one voice can be a catalyst to a powerful change.

What is your voice being used to proclaim? How will your life make a difference in the lives of others? In what way will you share what you've been blessed with? We have but one life, one chance, one voice - i urge each of us to use it in bettering the lives of others and living out a life of faith.



Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality -Romans 12:13